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Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Initial Gra Gra

I initially wanted to title this post "Initial Feelings", but I feel it may not do justice to what i really mean and want to write about in this post, but "Initial Gra Gra"  is more suiting. It seems to possess the drive and passion that comes with initial feelings that we experience when we meet people we really really are attracted to. If we fail to guard our hearts with all diligence, there is a probability that we will fall or experience this whether we are christians or not, married or not and irrespective of whether we are male or female.

What is Initial Gra Gra?

Initial gra gra occurs when we get carried away by the chemistry or attraction we experience with someone of the opposite sex. If you are married, check and curb it instantly. If you are unmarried, I urge you nonetheless to do the same. It usually starts subtly but usually gathers pace and momentum very quickly. It has the potential to blind us to reason, caution, self control, and most especially the voice of God. The chemistry and instant connection we have with certain people can almost spontaneously delude us into thinking that the "clicking" is God ordained.

A known fact about it is:

Initial Gra Gra has a downside, it is always short on fuel, short on the long distances, short on energy to last long. It is usually short lived. Like Butterflies, it perches for a while and then flies away. After a short while it wears off the eyes of those caught in it. Soon the shortcomings, blemishes, cracks, errors, and unpleasant sides of the couple begin to become obvious. As Gra Gra feelings begin to fade so does unpleasant feelings become pronounced. Feelings of boredom, irritation, anger, disdain, hate, and so on soon take over. This is what happens when we go into relationships based on feelings like this. We need to subject whatever we feel to the scrutiny of the Holy Spirit, scriptures and time. Don't act on it until you are sure it is right. Bible says, do not awaken love until it is READY.

In between it's chemistry and it's downside:

My major concern is what happens between when we meet someone and initial Gra Gra kicks in and when it wears off. What must have happened during that space of time?

1. The Two individuals must have acted on it

2. Consolidated it by constant communication

3. Must have entered some sort of relationship

4. The supposed chemistry must have led to certain sensual and emotional compromises. Compromises such as sex and related issues that ultimately ends when initial Gra Gra wears out. Some would go into irreversible errors, like tattooing names of their crush on their bodies, take nude pictures together in the heat of the moment, some break vital destiny, covenant and eternally valuable relationships for the sudden one and many more. I had a friend who years ago almost ended a four year relationship because she met someone who charmed her with his charisma in a few hours. After some counseling she got a "hard reset". Today she's married to the man she was in relationship with for four years and blessed with kids. 

5. Some financial commitments must have been made that will be considered a waste of valuable resources if it does not result in meaningful relationship.

There are more things that occur within this window of time of flowing in Initial Gra Gra, which also can be likened to "acting on a CRUSH". But I will like to leave you to figure it out.
What has come out of the crushes you have gone into without hesitation? What have you learnt from them? What have they resulted into? Pease ask yourself!

Saturday, December 28, 2013


Inherent in sin is the will to conceal it.

I consider this a profound truth. Sin comes with a pre-packaged or in-built self-preservation or self-concealing ability. When sin comes, it also comes with a desire and a will for it to be kept secret.
Sin is the number one reason why our world is what it is today and it is the reason Jesus came. It is one of the reasons for which grace is given to man. It is the sole reason why there is a hell and the only condition to qualify for it.

When you consider Adam and Eve, you will discover that their first reaction to falling into sin was to take cover, that is to hid.
It is your first reaction when you sin too. Be it lying, envy, sexual immortality, stealing etc. We see people engaging in these things daily but they would not readily admit it and when they admit, they still have folks or institutions they can admit it to.

Sin's in-built concealment software sort of installs in any man that sins thereby making such unwilling to admit their wrong.
This however is Sin's self-sustaining plan. With this Sin can perpetuate, sustain, preserve and improve itself in a man's life. This is Sin's power.
Sin prospers (grows, improves, increases and multiplies) when concealed or hidden. But the person who conceals it will not........
Proverbs  28:13 He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.

Concealment is Sin's staying power. Opening up is what destroys its hold. Don't let Sin have dominion over you. Speak out. Expose it.
I hear someone saying "you want me to expose myself?" Yes! Expose yourSELF! Expose your SELF! Expose SELF! Mr Self or if u like Mr Flesh must be exposed. He is a friend of Mr Sin. Don't hide him much longer.
Get on your knees, pray and talk to God and look for good folks and undress the sin that easily besets you.
God bless you.

Friday, October 4, 2013


I have being experiencing some pains of late, because i have being putting some resources into some areas of my life in order to reap some gain in the future. It is painful now. It is not comforting now. It has tightened my budget and sometimes makes me exasperated. I want to shout sometimes when i drop more resources into it. But then there is a hope ahead. The hope of an harvest. This hope keeps me going, keeps me investing, keeps me keen on the investment.
But sadly many pray and hope for harvest and gain where and when they have not invested. You have to have invested before you can dream of gain. When i was going for fitness training in a gym some time ago, the instructors often say "no pain no gain". The investment is the pain of the fitness regime, while the gain is the fitness attained.
What are you investing in yourself and in your life? You can invest in your personality, in your finances, marriage, education, relationships, ministry, family, etc. Lets make sure we are planting or sowing something for the future. The future depends on the actions of today.
It is not only money that can be invested, but it is the only thing we think that matters and can be invested. I have discovered we all have something to invest. Lets act now. Sow now. Invest your time, money, prayers, words, energy, etc, into what will culminate into fruits harvestable in the future. You have a seed to invest.
A sower went out to sow his seed............ Luke 8:5 NKJV
Investing answers to the law of cause and effect. Investing creates an effect every time, maybe not immediately but surely.
While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest,........... Genesis 8:22 KJV

Thursday, September 5, 2013

And You Shall Call His Name Jesus. 

But while he thought about these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take to you Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. And she will bring forth a Son, and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins. Matthew 1:20-21 NKJV

It is well stated in this passage the reason why the Son of God's earthly name is Jesus. Jesus means Savior. And the primary thing that He came to save us from is SIN. That is what Adam fell into that initiated all the death, darkness, ignorance, decadence, evil and chaos we see today. It striped man of Glory. In order for man to be restored and for all these chaos to be removed, the source of the decay which is SIN must be removed also. Hence the arrival and redemptive work of Jesus.

I repeat, the primary reason why Jesus came, and is called Jesus is to save from sin. If He saves you from sin, then the order of decadence, lust, poverty, death, curses, etc will dry up and cease. Don't seek prosperity, deliverance, and blessings, rather seek Jesus for freedom from the hold of sin. Then blessings can flow. Don't put the cart before the horse.

If Jesus' primary reason or objective or purpose for coming to us is to save us from our sins then irrespective of our callings, sin should be a primary thing we should seek to address and save ourselves and people from. As ministers, Pastors, Prophets and God seekers, sin should be the foundational issue we must seek to deal with. Irrespective of if we are called to teach or preach Prosperity, faith, healing, deliverance, discipleship, music, grace, holiness, prayer, evangelism, relationships, marriage, miracles, anointing, etc sin must be the primary issue we must seek to uproot. With sin in the lives of the people or ours, how effective is our message? What can we achieve with people whose lives are well controlled by sin? Our message will not bear fruit in them if sin is not addressed when we preach faith, grace or prayers to them. All our work in people's lives must have sin removal as a primary objective. I believe we will fail in our callings and fail our Lord who called us if we do not seek to address sin consistently in the discharge of our call.

It was and is still Jesus primary objective and so it must be yours and mine too.

As brothers and sisters, we must not relent, sin must not have a hold on us. It is possible to live free from the hold of sin, God demands it and we must obey Him. He is the source of power, lets seek Him and find Him till He makes the name Jesus (savior) real in our lives by saving us from all our sins.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Do Not Stir Up Love

Song of Solomon 2:7 MSG
Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don't excite love, don't stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you're ready.

Songs Of Solomon 3:5 & 8:4 repeats this divine instruction. When something is written in scripture, it has to be taken seriously. What if it is written thrice? The funniest thing is that this scripture is not one that is taken quite as it should.

Most relationships today starts with or because of emotions. By emotions i mean feelings of love and attachment. Whereas, it should not be the alpha of any relationship. Emotions should not be allowed until you are ready. Emotions at best will confuse you. It is unstable because it changes and often hinders Godly insights from being adhered to. This scripture show that the pattern here is the direct opposite to what the world system goes by. And isn't God's way always different? Don't go into that courtship until you are ready folks.

So what exactly does the bible mean by being READY? It means when all protocols and backings have being sorted out. It is not proper brothers and sisters for you to start an affair without God, parents and spiritual authorities over you permitting you. Without these backings and protocols observed, you are not ready. Don't let emotions lead you, let this pattern guide you. With this you will not miss it. God cant lead you astray. If He backs it the other authorities over your life will follow in time.

This pattern is like the process of purifying water to make it ready for use. The importance of its use will determine the more care and scrutiny that goes into the purification. Water for drinking is the most important and is the most expertly purified. Can i ask important is the person you will marry? He or she is not just a colleague, a casual friend, or neighbor who do not need the most serious scrutiny before you relate with. He or she is like the water you will drink, and it is important that you check that he or she is not harbouring a poisonous substance. Just as some poisons or impurities cant be found by the naked eyes so also the true nature of that brother or sister cant be known by our senses. Hence we need God. Please check with Him and also receive guidance from appropriate and necessary quarters.

When all protocols are duly observed then you are ready. Shalom.

Monday, June 10, 2013

Come Closer To See Closely.

Recently my designation changed in my place of work, and this meant that i had to leave the over two hundred people I oversee to go elsewhere and manage another bunch of people. Interestingly I looked back to the over two years i spent in that assignment and the several hundreds of lives that have passed through me during these period. It was saddening to realize my life had touched a little number of them EFFECTIVELY. I know I could have made a greater difference in these lives.

Why such a minimal impact?

I realized that a lot of them didnt realize who i am and what am capable of and thus couldn't take advantage of what i can offer.
A lot of them didn't know the gifts and abilities that I have and so could not connect to or take advantage of it.

So why did they not know?

Because they didn't come closer. A lot of them didn't bother to look closely. They judged me by my looks, dressing, demeanor, position, age, tribe, class, rumors, gossips, etc. And subsequently missed out on what my life could have poured into theirs.

Some people were college or childhood friends of very outstanding people today but they didn't see what they were capable of then. I now see how a lot of people would have passed through a lot of influential people without knowing. Only Heavens know those people you have allowed to slip away with content that could have accelerated your progress in life.

I felt sad as I attended the send off party held for me. I could have offered more and helped so much more. "What could I have done differently" was the thought in my heart. I was on the verge of blaming myself until I remembered Jesus. He reached out to everyone but few came close, and it was those few that later caught the revelation of Him as the Son of God. They didn't know until they came close. Those who didn't come close couldn't know. He called some, like the rich young man but he couldn't come because of his riches. After a three-year ministry whose impact thousands of years later, we're yet to recover from, Jesus left only a few close people on the earth. People who truly knew Him and in whom He poured much into were few. 

Others won't come close because He was regarded as one who performed miracles through Beelzebub. Some where discouraged by the rumors peddled against Him. A lot just criticized Him for His success, some because He challenged their religious beliefs and others because He associated with the poor.
Do you know you might be criticizing people you ought to be close to. You wont understand and see them properly from a distance. Same way a lot of people may have criticized and misrepresented you.

How many people have you failed to connect with or harness their potential because you stayed afar of? Whereas if you had moved closer they could have been a pivot for your lifting and destiny. God uses people, and there are people positioned to help us, all we have to do is "come thither".


Monday, May 13, 2013


Gen 16:2  And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it MAY BE that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai. (KJV)

Rom 14:5  One man esteemeth one day above another: another esteemeth every day alike. Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind.

Heb 11:13  These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth.

Rom 14:23  And he that doubteth is damned if he eat, because he eateth not of faith: for whatsoever is not of faith is sin. 

The first time I noticed the phrase MAY BE in Genesis 16: 2 it struck me instantly as a word filled with probability and therefore void of Faith i.e an absence of God's word. This is a family of Faith who have left their home and relatives and so on to pursue God's promise to them. They were living in Faith until this moment. There are always moments like this in a Believer's life, when his or her Faith in God's word is pressurized by situations, circumstances, friends, comments, social, economic, physical and cultural realities. Friends, family and very close confidants will question what God has convinced you of. Paul said we must be fully persuaded. The heroes of Hebrews 11 were also fully persuaded. And you too must be. You must revisit and solidify the belief you have in the teachings, instructions and promises God has made to you. Never make a decision with a "MAY BE". It is a doubt based word and not a faith based word. Never execute an action not knowing if it is within God's will and plan for you.

Don't change location, jobs, church, ministry, etc with a "maybe" it is God's will mindset. Please be sure. God has spoken to you about His will for your life in marriage and simply because he has not approached you about it you begin to have doubts and you begin to move away. Who told you God Has not spoken to him too. Who told you it is not you that he is thinking about even though it SEEMS to you that it is another he is watching. God is true to His word. Relax. He has shown you a vision of tomorrow yet you doubt it because of what today looks like. Dont worry. Please dont take a wrong step out of doubt.

Sarai made an ASSUMPTION! "MAY BE this is the way God will do it" "MAY BE this is the guy i will marry, he SEEMS a nice person". "MAY BE i should go into this business or that". ASSUMPTIONS are not of Faith elements and consequently any action taken throught it is a SIN! Romans 14: 23.
Assumptions are always in the direction of the easiest or most sensible or obvious options. The Faith option is the God ordained way for us. Revisit what He said and stay on it. If only Abram and Sarai did that, there wont be Ishmael and consequently none of the issues and wars in the middle east.
What is the consequence of your "MAY BE" going to be in the future? That action you are taking via assumption, what will it result in? That business, that relationship, that marriage, that change of job or location, what will it lead to in the future? It will certainly take mercy for it not to result in an unpleasant end. Let's be wise friends.

Never again assume God's will. Be sure of it. Don't agree with an assumption of God's will like Abram did when Sarai came up with it.